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I Want to Knit
Friday, March 10, 2006
Where Was I?
Oh yes. My gastroscopy story.

Well, not long after we started waiting they brought me a gown to put on over my jeans and a bed to lie on. At this point we started to realize how long it would take to wait and Yannick asked if I minded if he left and came back to get me later, as he was working and couldn't miss the time for his deadline. I said "sure", because being the good little knitter I am, I brought knitting with me! So picture this: Yannick leaves, I spend 2 minutes sitting on my cot in the hallway before jumping off the cot, grabbing my knitting out of the Ziplock in my purse in the storage area under the cot and hopping back on. So there I am in the hallway knitting away on my lap with the yarn trailing off under the cot into my purse where the ball was. I thought it looked hysterical, but at least I wasn't bored! Soon enough a nurse came up and got me prepped for the doctor. She put a shunt (or whatever it's called) in the crook of my elbow to open a vein so it would be ready for the doctor's assistant to give me the drugs later when they would do the test. Next thing I know I feel liquid running down my arm. Turns out the shunt wasn't closed (or whatever the terminology is) so my blood was pouring out. The funny nurse says "At least I know I got a vein!" followed by "Don't worry, I didn't get any on your knitting!" I was just relieved that I'd brought the red Goldilocks Shrug instead of the beige Homespun Jacket! She actually had to clean up both the cot and the floor, that's how much spilled. Weird feeling, seeing blood everywhere with no pain. Anyways...

I only had a chance to do a few rows when they wheeled me in to see the doc. From that point on it was like I was in a revolving door- that's how fast it went. First they explained the risks to me (I'd refused to sign the waiver until I knew what they were) and then they made me open my mouth while the doc approached with a long narrow tube that looked like a can of WD-40 with the straw attached. He said "this is the only bad part" then sprayed the inside of my mouth a few times. EEEEUUUYUCH!!! He wasn't kidding! It tasted so bad that I actually had to say it out loud a few times. I even told them how the pharmacies are all advertising that they can add flavor to your meds...the hospital should really think of looking into that! (I know they won't, I was just saying...) While this was going on the nurse injected me with Valium and Demerol, so by the time I'd said "that was horrible!" for the 5th time I was already starting to slur my words. It wasn't even 2 minutes later when the doc covered most of my face with a towel (or something) and started sliding the camera down. I remember gagging a few times but it really wasn't that bad. I didn't feel the camera going down, I was only gagging because I could feel it at the back of my throat. 2 moments of gagging, a lot of drooling and it was done. [I'm so not going there so don't even wait for it.] They made me lie down for about 20 minutes to wear off the drugs, then I was allowed to get dressed and call Yannick to come get me. And that was it. No pain, it didn't hurt a bit and by the time he came to pick me up I'd even forgotten any worst of it, what little there was.

It would have been nice to go home and sleep off the meds but I'd promised to pick up my brother from the airport so I knitted away the afternoon and evening until it was time to go. I wasn't in any condition to drive but Yannick's best friend K (as he will remain until I get permission to state his name) was super-sweet and picked me up and drove me to go get Aaron. He played me some really cool songs in the car. Turns out there's a Bif Naked remake of a Metallica song that was awesome, as well as a really cool update on Black Betty that I think he said was from the Dukes of Hazzard soundtrack. There was also a Nickelback song...Holy Pornography Batman!

Wednesday I spent the night working on the questionnaires for the PenPals group I started in Yahoo. Just waiting for them all to come in so I can match everyone up. If anyone is interested in signing up here's the link: Needle Arts PenPals: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/needleartspenpals/

Yesterday I crashed after work and did a few rows on the Homespun Jacket's shawl collar before passing out. I actually just typed "I did a few rows before crashing" but decided to specify that the rows were of knitting and not of anything else that is done in rows. Just so we're clear.

Tonight I did a huge mitzvah and offered to pick my other brother up from a Metro station not really near work or home and drive him and a friend home. It basically entailed sitting in my car for an hour waiting for him then driving half an hour to get to her house and then another ten minutes to get him home. I'm still trying to come up with a favor he can do for me that's worth the hour and forty minutes of my life. ;) (Is it really a mitzvah if you're repayed eventually?)

Afterwards I met Yannick and K for a quick bite at Extreme Pita. On my way there I noticed that the used book store was still open, so even though they'd already ordered for me, I ran in to check out the knitting book stash. There was none but I got a few magazines. Pics coming up right away...
posted by Jennifer Lori @ 9:33 pm  
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